Another Saturday night, and I ain't got no... car..

Prelude # 1: I recently met up with my friend Beau after not seeing him for maybe 2 years. He, ID, myself, and his friend Stewart all sat an Irish pub while Beau and I caught up on life with each other.
I'm not going to lie, Beau is hot, I thought about dating him once, I'm pretty sure he felt the same. After 2 years of not seeing me, he immediately asked if I was still seeing EX and then asked right after if I was seeing someone currently.

Prelude # 2: NotGay and I have been friends for 3 years now. I'm not going to lie, he's hot too. I actually have never thought about dating him though, its odd, he might even been cuter than Beau, but still... nothing... I've never wanted to date him. NG is one of those guys, who unless spoken directly to, will not say anything. He's the Silent Bob of the group, and unless he has just something really important or good to say, he doesn't talk.

I bet you think, dear readers, that you know where this is going, I doubt it.

So Friday night hits, like waves crashing against the rocks, and ID, NG, FN, and I all go to Harry's for the evening. Matt is writing a paper, so even though I told him I was going out, I didn't encourage him to come. At 8 we started the pitchers of beer, and by 9 we are all feeling pretty good. NotGay leans forward to the table and says, "I've got a story for you guys."
Since he never opens his mouth for any story, there were immediate crickets at our table.

"Saturday night (March 31st) I went out with my roommate Josh and got piss drunk. Josh left me because he was following some girl around, and I stumbled out to my car alone," he started.
"Please tell me you didn't drive home drunk..." I said very worried.
"Worse," he said and then continued on, "So I was walking through the parking lot, and I couldn't find my car, so I thought maybe I parked it in the garage. I walked into the garage and approached a car that I believed to be mine.... The next moment I woke up after blacking out, and I was parked in front of my apartment... in a car... that wasn't mine."

If there were crickets before, you could hear a pin drop at this point.

"I went to turn off the car so I could get out, the key wouldn't turn, the car wouldn't shut off and I was at a loss on what to do," he continued, "So after talking with Josh, we decided to just leave the car running in my parking lot, and we both went inside and passed out.
The next day when we got up, the car was still sitting there running, so we decided to return it to its original place. I got into the car, and I found my credit card in the seat, so Josh and I quickly went through the car to find any thing else I might have lost and found out the owner's name is Sarah ******. We parked the car back into the garage, wiped down our prints, and turned and pulled the key out with a pair of pilers... locked the car, and left," he finished off.

For a moment no one said anything.
IrishDrinker recovered first, and said, "Are you serious?"
NG said, "Yea, I'm not making this up, but it was funny, when returned the car, we realized that it was April Fools day."

We all had a good, shocked, nervous, laugh out of that story, and after about the 20th "Are you serious?" question out of someone's mouth, I decided I had to go to the bathroom.

On the way there I ran into Stewart (Beau's friend) and said hi. He asked where we were sitting and I told him, and he left to go say hello to IrishDrinker and FabulouslyNew.
When I got back to the table, Stewart was sitting at it.
I sat down next to FN and NG, and smiled at Stewart, who stood up to shake my hand.
I shook it, looked at him, realized he was wasted, and laughed... this prompted him to say "QSW you are one hot mama," while shaking my hand.
"Aw... I don't have kids," I said in an attempt at a joke.
"Doesn't matter," he said, still holding onto my hand.
"Can I have my hand back?" I finally said.
He sat down and turned his attentions to IrishDrinker.
NotGay was bristling.
"What the hell is wrong with that guy?" he said.
"He's harmless" I said, "Just really drunk."
"I think he wants to sleep with you, you should see how he was looking at you when you walked up to the table." he said, obviously angry.
I gave him a look but said nothing.

NotGay was not one to bristle like that, in fact, many guys have hit on me in front of him and he's said nothing.... hell... Matt has said nothing when guys have done that.

Stewart stood up again, and reached out his hand towards me.
Laughing and taking it, he shook my hand once again, and said, "QSW, can I take you out to dinner sometime?"
Before I could answer, a hand went around my waist and NotGay said, "I don't think my girlfriend should go out on dates with other guys."
Stewart looked a little bummed but then remembered he had a beer in front of him and soon all was right in his world.
NotGay's hand moved from my waist, to rest on my knee and I just stared at the back of his head in disbelief. I looked at FN.
FN mouthed the words "Don't fight it," to me and then started wildly fanning himself.
I rolled my eyes.

At this point I decided to text message Beau and Matt.
To Beau: Stewart seems to have taken a fond regard to me, and my fake boyfriend is going to kick his ass if he doesn't calm down.
To Matt: NotGay stole a car, and now he's pretending to be my boyfriend, how is your evening going?

The response was entertaining..
From Beau: Wait, I thought you had a real boyfriend, I would have asked you out if I had known he was only a fake one.
From Matt: Aw.. you two are like Thelma and Louise except you could have pretty babies together, I'm playing Wii, I think I'm going to have a heart attack.

There was a lot of explaining to do through text messaging to Beau, and I had an even longer conversation with Matt later on when he realized I was serious about the car stealing. Apparently he thought my sarcatic nature was exaggerating the 'car stealing' part.

Over all, interesting night with the bunch.